Irish pub bar or candy bar?

Written By: admin - Sep• 08•08

I know this isn’t the best picture (not sure why my camera was set on “obscenely tiny photos”), so I’ll translate below.


This is from a local serve-yourself eatery, and it says “We know… You can’t resist!  However bar items are sold by the pound.”

I know this isn’t a terrible error, but it did prove to me that my brain is stuck on “edit.”  I didn’t see the “We know you can’t resist,” hidden in that distracting green bubble;  I just saw “However bar items are sold by the pound.”  And I seriously thought to myself, “What’s a however bar?”

Of course, if they had inserted the necessary comma after “however” I would probably have posted this anyway to chide them for starting a sentence with “however,” so, you know, there’s no pleasing me.

Election-year bloopers! New category!

Written By: admin - Sep• 04•08

Yeah, there are just going to be too many of these before November.  And heck, I’m betting there may be a few after November, too — if I’d only started in 2000 I’d have some doozies.  So here you go, guys:  the third in my retroactively-labeled politics series.  Typos 2008!  Or something.


(As linked above, this picture is from The Daily News, where it was found by Julie.  Keep up the good work, y’all!)


Written By: admin - Jun• 18•08

I’m going with CIP (that’s “crying in private”).

There are a couple things I’d red-pen on this sign if I were asked to do so, including the random insertion of double exclamation points in what is supposed to be a professional advertisement.

But double exclamation points and a tilde? Is this some hip new thing the youngsters are doing?

photo026 My thanks to Scott, whose MARTA ennui is probably worse than mine.

Bzzt! No RPB pin for you!

Written By: admin - Jun• 16•08

And now, ladies and germs, a rarely-seen-in-the-wild gem:  a perfectly correct* sign that has been edited by a wanna-be honorary RPB member!  Because honestly, the only thing better than grammatical mistakes is sanctimonious and erroneous grammatical correction!


*Yes, okay, we can have a little debate about whether we need a hyphen in “well-stocked.”  But there’s no argument to be made for the comma except that somebody wants to make me poke my eyes out with a spork.

I… don’t even have a clue.

Written By: admin - May• 12•08

Were they going for “flea and tick”?  And if so… why?  And if not… I’m at a total loss.


Poop is always funny.

Written By: admin - Apr• 07•08

Not tremendously exciting, but still an intriguing use of random capitals, a debatable hyphen, and one gleefully extraneous comma!

pooch comma2


pooch comma

Noodle run-ons (runs-on?)

Written By: admin - Mar• 18•08

Laura writes:

It starts off telling you how to figure out what to order, and not to grab a table before you order. But then you get to the last little mini-paragraph on the sign at Noodles & Co., and you see the attached.

Is it bad that I’m tempted to take a Sharpie and add a comma and a semi-colon? There are actually 2 signs in the restaurant, more or less identical. (And no, this isn’t actually hand-written. They’re mass-produced, and there’s at least one in every location.)

No, Laura, it’s not bad. It’s natural. Give in to your urges. Carry a red pen!


High-class /= grammatically inclined

Written By: admin - Mar• 14•08

Rather than doing a screencap, I will quote the text of the Emperors Club website, so much in the news of late.

Emperors’ Club vip is the most preferred international social introduction service for those accustomed to excellence. Introducing the most impressive models to leading gentleman of the world is our expertise. We specialize in introductions of: fashion models, pageant winners and exquisite students, graduates and women of successful careers (finance, art, media etc…) to gentlemen of exceptional standards. When seeking an evening date, a weekend travel companion, or a friend to accompany you during your next business / social function our models are perfect preference.

We act for a select group of educated, refined and successful international clients who give their best in all they do and who, in return, only wish to receive the best. Catering to clients who will not compromise in any area of their life. We provide our customers and associates with full discretion, confidentiality and guarantee the most exclusive and discreet social introduction services. Our presentation and photos of each model are recent and accurate. The poses intentionally conceal their faces, as each model companion is either a University Student or, more commonly, a career professional. This guarantees privacy, public comfort and discretion for both our clients and models when dating.

Our meticulous standards of beauty, intelligence and charm ensure that you always encounter the quality you’ve come to expect in a woman, when with an Emperors’ Club vip model. Each of our companions is a product of an exceptionally fine background and a success in her right. All rendezvous are individually crafted to suit the needs of your specific occasion. Note that each model has place in her schedule for a select number of appointments per month, so your date will be a special one for both of you.

Our goal is to make life more peaceful, balanced, beautiful and meaningful. We honor commitment to our clients as we covet long-term relationships of trust and mutual benefit. Experience for yourself a service of obvious distinction…

So, yeah. Firstly, I am annoyed by the fact that the title of the page is “Emperors Club” and every subsequent reference uses an apostrophe. Then there are a couple sentence fragments, a terrible neglect of the “Oxford comma,” some singulars where there should be plurals… and that’s before we go anywhere near the curious diction of “exquisite students” and how they’re each successful “in her right.”

Let this be a lesson to us all. When soliciting extremely high-priced call girls, RED PEN first!

Surprisingly amusing

Written By: admin - Feb• 28•08

Perhaps I’m supposing that the commas-as-ellipsis is the attempt of a frustrated fellow punctuation-ophile who wants to right the wrongs of missing commas all over the world, but for some reason, this one brings me joy.


P.S. Extra points: is there a word for “punctuation-ophile”? A quick google doesn’t turn one up.

I’m so confused

Written By: admin - Feb• 12•08

Rayanne says she’d been saving this glass for me for months.

If only the producers had taken anything like that much time to copyedit…


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