Entries Tagged 'punctuation' ↓

Kacia wants you all to take a deep breath and not worry.

I mean, nobody’s getting in trouble for violating parking rules.  Not here.  So, you know, go crazy!

Colleen exclaims, “We were the best! Now we’re not.”

It’s always so refreshing to see this stuff coming from schools!  It makes me feel warm and fuzzy.

I could make several individual posts out of the pictures I took at a single store this weekend.  But I won’t, because that feels like cheating.  So here we go.

The best part about this one was that it was a copy.  They’d copied it and posted it all over one end of the store, an exuberant festival of abused apostrophes and quotation marks.

I’m willing to give points for consistency.  If you want to argue that you’re going to just preface every single “s” with an apostrophe — I mean, you’d be wrong, but at least you’d be consistent.  Similarly if you argued that pluralization should occur with apostrophes: still wrong, but some points.  I’d even accept an (incorrect) argument that nouns that end in the singular with a vowel, like “sample,” require an apostrophe for pluralization, whereas those ending with consonants don’t.  But why on earth would you pluralize “sample” and “cap” with an apostrophe and NOT “box”?

John provides some background:

A local road that is  under construction has some poorly maintained train tracks at a steep angle to the roadway.  Many cyclists have been injured when their bicycle tires get caught in the tracks.  Instead of filling the tracks with rubber, allowing trains to use the tracks and cyclists to cross safely, the railroad put up this sign.

Urgh.  “Seriously.”

Galen found all three of these at the same place, just north of Ellsworth, ME.  She even provided the commentary.

Live onions?  Or will there be something else alive on my plate?  I didn’t order it. Also a missing apostrophe where there should be one!

When in doubt, use a comma.

I think this belongs in a new category. Maybe “Not quite the lyrics” would be a good title?  Anyway, I have no idea why there were lyrics on the menu, but I’m pretty sure they left out some words.

…Y’all don’t really need me at all, do you?

Look, we cut it daily, okay?  So it’s fresh cut.  But we don’t want you smart-alecks getting all fussy when you notice that the fruit is moldy.  I mean, it’s two weeks old, right?  So it’s not so much “fresh” by any real definition of the word.  It’s just fresh-cut.

I saw this one and I thought “At last, an appropriate use of quotation marks on a handmade grocery store sign!”

Yes, that’s right — “Yum yum” could well be what kids say while eating watermelon, and therefore does in fact belong in quotes.  Get this sign-maker a cookie!

But then, I saw this…

I suppose it’s possible that my friend the sign-writer was making a comment on the nature of watermelon as a treat.  Because let’s be honest, if it isn’t made of chocolate, it isn’t a treat, amIright?

When you’re not sure whether or not to use an apostrophe, just… kind of put an apostrophe.  Then you can claim it was an ink smudge if it turns out you were wrong.

I’m not sure exactly what a “wingett” is — or if, as Reporter #1 wonders, it should more properly be spelled “wingette.”  But whatever it is and however it’s spelled, I’m STILL POSITIVE it shouldn’t be pluralized with an apostrophe.

Kacia says it all:

This is from a certain Midwestern liberal arts institution that may or may not recently have held a reunion. Where is the punctuation??! Apparently, parking/loading/unloading are the only forbidden  actions– anything else is perfectly fine.

And knowing which educational institution you mean, Kacia, I’d say that’s a pretty dangerous assertion!